A recent instalment of one of my favourite publications: Sufi Comics was all about The Secret to Unity in a Divided World and, while beautifully drawn and refreshingly insightful (as always!), it was fairly standard fare about separate realities and being open to different perspectives.
(It even went as far as re-telling the old story about the blindfolded people, each given a different bit of an elephant, to try and describe what animal it was.)
You’ll probably enjoy reading it on that link above (or by clicking on the image), but don’t feel you have to, because I’m going to pull out the deeper message for you, that is left unexplored when he says,
“When our opinions become part of our identity, any challenge to them feels like a threat to who we are.”
That stopped me dead.
Because that’s it: the key to fulfilling, conflict-free relationships!
The biggest ‘opinion’ we hold, is identity itself.
😲
See for yourself
Cast your mind back to the last time you had a disagreement with someone.
Literally, just take a moment to do that, now (if you can bear to).
How did it feel?
Not great, right? Like you were a bit under attack, I’m guessing.
(I’ve had more than half a century of being human – I can relate 😉)
But here are today’s pointers for you to consider:
- What if… it’s not actually you that’s under attack in these situations?
- What if… the only thing that’s at risk is the mind’s story about who it thinks you are, or how you should be; merely its opinions?
- What if… it’s innocent identification with these thought-creations that is getting in the way of a more harmonious relationship, in that moment?
And the biggie, of course…
- What would it mean for your relationships to see this more deeply?
🤔
Giles