There's nothing wrong with me

It’s been a few months since I was at the 3 Principles Conference, and one particular talk has really stuck with me.

In fact, it’s stuck with me so much, that I’ve been sharing its simple message with clients and groups, ever since!

It was a comment from Shane Kennedy – the chap who captured so many of Syd Banks’ conversations on video tape, releasing them over the years, through his company, Lone Pine Publishing.

He was talking about how he wasn’t really a teacher of the 3 Principles, nor did he consider himself particularly knowledgeable. But he explained that years ago he had one simple, common-sense insight that he’s held on to, and worked from, and let grow over time, and it’s changed his life completely (into what he calls a beautiful life, full of adventure and tragedy).

So often, we get a brief glimpse behind the curtain, having a moment of insight about ourselves, or the nature of things—“Oh yeah… of course!”—and it feels great.

There’s a feeling of okayness, of coming home, of being at one with the world.

A couple of days or weeks later though, we’re back to taking it all for granted – a new normal has been established! The mind has become restless again and is off on another of its seeking adventures:

📦🗣️: What’s the next insight I’m going to have?

The mind loves having experiences, especially ones where we get to feel great, and it’s attached ‘having an insight’ to ‘feeling great’ so that’s what it does. Creates another of its stories; this time:

📦🗣️: “I’ll be happy when… I have an insight.”

It leads to a life of perpetual seeking - the nagging feeling that ‘there must be more…’

It’s such a little monkey!

🐒

Not long after the conference, I was invited to speak in a private group, and was asked what was one of the main insights I’d had about myself, since coming across the 3 Principles.

I’d considered this before, and while there are a few stories I have told about insights I’ve had, I think the main one was realising, beyond a shadow of doubt, that there was absolutely nothing wrong with me (a belief I’d been innocently operating from for 40+ years, prior to that moment).

And because that realisation happened quite a few years ago, and I’ve just taken it on as a fact of the human make-up in general (it’s the ‘Innate Health’ in us all that I’m always banging on about), I think I’d maybe started taking it for granted.

The host of the group reflected it back to me, saying something like,

“Blimey! That sounds like a pretty life-changing realisation to have!”

… and I suddenly re-remembered what a MASSIVE deal that was!!

I mean, just look at the difference in how we’d show up in life, with (or without) that realisation:

• There’s something wrong with me → Constant seeking of fixes, coping mechanisms and exhausting attempts to ‘better’ ourselves; approval-seeking and endless striving for more… all of it guaranteed to never reach any kind of resolution
• There’s nothing wrong with me → None of that nonsense makes sense any more.

And it’s important to know this, because the way life is set up, it will certainly look like there’s something wrong with us, on an almost daily basis!

• My business isn’t going how I expected it to: there’s something wrong with me
• I have a habit I don’t like: there’s something wrong with me
• There’s tension in a relationship: there’s something wrong with me
• Parenting feels like a struggle: there’s something wrong with me
• I don’t like the way I behave in that particular situation: there’s something wrong with me
• I can't seem to shake this particular feeling-state: there’s something wrong with me

… and on and on it goes.

I think this is what Shane was talking about when he said to be grateful for the one simple insight you have had, and work your way outwards from there.

Because every time I fall back into the simple truth that there’s nothing wrong with me—or with you, or with anyone!—life flows effortlessly.

(And I too, get to live a beautiful life, full of adventure and tragedy.)

So what’s your one simple insight you’re innocently taking for granted?

Let me know in the comments, I’d love to hear!

And how about relaxing back into that insight, and living life from that place, just for today?

💟

Giles

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