“I’m nervous.”
This was me, yesterday, stood in the kitchen, speaking to my wife.
And what did it look like I was nervous ‘about’?
You’ll never guess…
Riding my bike!!!
😲
This is me who rides his bike most days. The mind-body that rode solo from Great Britain to Turkey and back. The racer, the tourer, the writer, the (one time) qualified cycling coach…
It didn’t make sense!!
🤷🏻♂️
But it does, really, when we look at how the mind deals with the data it’s presented with, moment to moment.
You see, I’d been ill—nothing fancy, just a lingering upper respiratory thing—and it was a full three weeks since I’d been anywhere near a bike.
And the mind—fickle, forgetful—had already lost its immediate frame of reference for what ‘going out on a long bike ride’ meant. Strange as it may sound, given all that experience mentioned above, it was lacking in data.
There had been a reset.
And we all know what minds do when they’re lacking in data.
They make stuff up.
That was the source of the nervous feeling I was experiencing.
To better understand this, it’s probably more informative to look at what the mind does when we’re doing something regularly; when it looks like it does know.
When we’re in a regular pattern of activity, it thinks it can predict what’s going to happen. It’s got lots of recent data to work with, and it therefore convinces itself that there’s nothing to worry about.
It is ‘secure’—the etymology of which comes from the latin: ‘se’ = without and ‘cura’ = care—and so we don’t experience anxiety. It doesn’t make up scary stories.
Does this mean it’s correct in its predictions of safety and comfort and everything’s-ok-nothing-to-worry-about-here-ma’am?
Hell no!!!
The number of times I’ve set out on a bike ride without a care in the world and things have quickly unravelled… they’re too many to count!
(If you don’t believe me I can provide you with contact details for my wife – she’ll put you straight.)
😂🤣
Because none of this has anything to do with cycling or any other pastime you might engage in, for that matter.
Oddly, we never get to experience those things directly.
And that’s really good to know.
So if you have a special something that you like to do and it’s more than, ohh, let’s say three weeks since you’ve done it, don’t be surprised if it feels like a chore.
Don’t be surprised if ‘you’ (i.e. the mind) feel unsure and maybe even a little anxious.
Don’t be surprised if it tries to talk you out of it, just so it can keep on telling stories that keep ‘you’ (i.e. it) feeling safe.
What’s that quote?
The hardest thing about getting to the moon is the very first part: overcoming the earth’s gravitational pull.
The mind’s stories can be incredibly compelling, but the more we see their essentially harmless, self-referential nature, the easier it is to break free from them.
And live our lives, doing the things we know we enjoy.
Here's what I was rewarded with, when I broke free, yesterday:
💟
Giles
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