It’s fair to say that most people who end up in my practice want to change something. Often, that something is a behaviour.
I’m happy to help, but there’s almost always a fair bit of un-learning to do first.
Because somewhere along the line, we’ve got it into our heads that to change a behaviour, we need to work on the behaviour itself.
Try and wrestle change out of it.
Catch ourselves when we’re doing it, and STOP doing it.
Or maybe we’ve caught a whiff of this thing called ‘thought’ being the issue, so then the mind jumps in and says,
📦🗣️: “Right, I need to think differently about this when it happens. Find a way to re-frame these situations.”
Doing, doing, doing… we’re such busy little bees, aren’t we?
🐝
But have (yet) another look at the very first Key Message I share with clients and groups alike, when I work through the FOUNDATIONS of my 4-step change process:
Just reflect on that statement for a moment.
(I showed it to a group for the first time, just the other day, and there was something of a stunned silence, as they processed its obviousness.)
Can you see the utter futility of trying to change what you do?
Once the mind-body is coming up with a response in the form of a behaviour, that’s that. It’s done. It’s there. There’s no going back.
(It would be like trying to get eggs back out of an omelette.)
No, we change the second bit of that statement: ‘what makes sense’.
And the only way that happens, is through insight.
We get a shift in perspective. We see something new about the nature of experience, and the mind-body’s response is consequently different.
The old behaviour no longer makes sense… and it goes away.
As I have heard said, many times, of this work,
“It’s not magic, but is sure as hell feels magical!”
✨
Giles
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Giles P Croft