Iām two weeks in to the RECONNECT course with a wonderful bunch of intrepid explorers and things are starting to be seen differently.
Minds donāt necessarily like it, but minds have got very little to do with what weāre reconnecting to, so thatās maybe not all that surprising.
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Minds are also doing that very natural thing where they hop, skip and jump into the future, trying to figure out what all this baffling nonsense that Giles is throwing at them means for real life situations.
(Which is where change occurs.)
Take for instance one participant, who has a decision to make. Itās a time-sensitive, clear-cut decision that involves their values and other peopleās opinions and they donāt know what to do.
(Like most decisions, eh?)
And as part of the course, and the plethora of additional materials Iāve shared with the participants, their mind has heard that weāre not in control of what thoughts arise, we donāt get to choose (for who is this āchooserā anyway, but for more thought arising, being believed?) and essentially weāre being lived by life, witness to it all, but not in control.
Which begs the question, Oh whatās the point?!?!
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I laugh, because I went through thisāI remember throwing all my toys out of the pram and getting really pissed off with a renowned teacher I was having a coaching session withāand pretty much every client and every group I work with goes through this same reaction.
The struggle is real!
A mind hears that the crown it wearsāthe one it feels itās earned by being in charge of things around here for all your lifeāis actually made of the same stuff as fairly dust and unicorn farts (i.e. imagination) and very understandably it has a bit of a tantrum.
And this can show up in all sorts of ways. Anger (me), confusion, despair, apathy, fear, avoidance, denialā¦
ā¦and ultimately, a freedom of sorts.
I canāt remember which book of his itās in, but Michael Neill describes this acknowledgment as getting up the courage to let go of the reins⦠and then noticing that the reins weāve just let go of were only ever attached to a rocking horse, thatās on the back of a boat, sailing happily down a river.
Because when we see that we never were in control in the first place, it brings a real lightness to everything. Itās not that decisions donāt get madeāthe mind body organism will continue to do what makes sense, whatever the mind has to say about that.
No, we just that we get distance from the voice that:
- is trying to secure its very existence by continuing to insist that itās doing all this
- says that what happens affects how it will feel in the future
- believes that there are consequences to its standing in the pecking order
- insists that whatās going on must also be considered in the context of what others think of itā¦
ā¦and with all that going on, itās no wonder we get stuck!!
Thereās something deeper within us, that removes the need to keep turning our attention to this blathering mind for āadviceā; something that is more than aware of our place in the whole, our relationships with others, and the unique path weāre on.
You can trust that āsomething deeper within youā to do what makes sense, when the time comes.
And⦠you can absolutely guarantee that the mind will observe any actions taken, immediately label this as āa decisionā and subsequently have a lot to say about it all, pulling your emotions hither and thither with it, as it does so!
The more you can see thisāby slowing down, examining your own experience, getting your own evidenceāthe fewer ādecisionsā you will have to make.
Ahhh, thereās that āfreedom of sortsā again.
š
Giles
In this profoundly insightful 1h28 Decision-Making Video Masterclass, we go beyond conventional ātips for smarter decisionsā, to explore the mechanics of choice itself:
⢠How do we ādecide for the bestā?
⢠Best for whom?
⢠How do things change when we're aligned with our inner resources⦠and when the illusion of control evaporates?
