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# ‘People prep’
- URL: https://www.gilespcroft.com/people-prep/
- Published: 2025-11-13T07:00:00.000Z
- Updated: 2026-02-03T23:03:27.000Z
- Description: What exactly does your mind think it's trying to achieve here? 🗒️
- Author: Giles P Croft
- Tags: Relationships, Presence, Psychology, Thought realisation, Richard Carlson, IMPLICATIONS

Do you prepare for conversations with others?

🤔

Such a little thing to see, and so utterly life-changing when you do.

That mental rehearsing we can lose literal hours to –

> 📦🗣️: *“Then he’ll say this, and I’ll respond like this… but what if she says this (I bet she does. She always does!), well then I’ll say…”*

And on it goes.

I mean, look, you’re welcome to do it. I’m not saying you ‘shouldn’t’ (🚩) 

Just know that you’re losing precious chunks of life, when you do.

What’s more… you’re allowing the mind to prime itself to see what it expects to see. 

Minds are phenomenally good at pattern-matching in relationships, and if you’re not careful, some of your most important ones will get stuck in patterns that it looks like you can’t escape from.

I just thought you should know.

💝

This was such a ***huge*** thing for me to see, personally, I can even remember when and where it clicked for me.

It will have been around 2005\. I was driving my treacherously sporty Ford Puma to work, listening to a Richard Carlson audio programme (probably [*Creating Miracles Every Day*](https://amzn.to/4qTaDWd?ref=gilespcroft.com)) on a MiniDisc™ 💽 that I’d created from the cassettes.

🤓

[Creating Miracles EverydayCheck out this great listen on Audible.com. By the author of the national bestsellers Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff and Don’t Worry, Make Money The frantic pace of our daily lives can take a serious toll on even the most calm and collected person. Who has time to worry about happiness, health, and…![](https://storage.ghost.io/c/9b/f3/9bf3d316-7d32-494b-814f-a7d94d6358c3/content/images/icon/MobileWeb_IOSandAndroid_460._SY180_CB651482445_.png)Audible.co.ukRichard Carlson Ph.D.![](https://m.media-amazon.com/images/I/51Hz6xJp6YL._SL10_UR1600,800_CR200,50,1200,630_CLa|1200,630|51Hz6xJp6YL.jpg|0,0,1200,630+82,82,465,465_PJAdblSocialShare-Gradientoverlay-largeasin-0to70,TopLeft,0,0_PJAdblSocialShare-AudibleLogo-Large,TopLeft,600,270_OU01_ZBLISTENING%20ON,617,216,52,500,AudibleSansMd,30,255,255,255.jpg)](https://www.audible.co.uk/pd/Creating-Miracles-Everyday-Audiobook/B00NYA2U6K?source%5Fcode=ASSGB149080119000H&share%5Flocation=pdp&ref=gilespcroft.com)

So, **so* good 😍

I would say ‘happy days’ but I was barely listening to the audio, because I was too busy working up a head of steam about all the conversations I was going to have when I got there.

Thankfully Richard’s voice cut through my thought-creations as he started talking about maybe *not* wasting time mentally rehearsing what we were ‘going to say’ to other people at the *exact same moment* I was mentally rehearsing what I was ‘going to say’ to other people.

I almost crashed the car!!

> *Wait, WHAT did he just say?!?!*

😳

Ha ha! It’s *that* powerful a realisation to have.

And the great news is, it’s *all* that’s required to totally change your day – **realise you’re doing it**.

It’s so obviously pointless, that awareness is both prescription and cure.

Let’s give it a catchy name, so that you remember it (and stop doing it), later today. How about a different “3Ps” for you:

> **Practicing ‘People Prep’**

You’re welcome.

😘

Giles

### Your next read

[Pattern matching in relationshipsThe mind looks for what it expects to see. What’s yours looking for? 🔍![](https://storage.ghost.io/c/9b/f3/9bf3d316-7d32-494b-814f-a7d94d6358c3/content/images/icon/DR_Lockup-Black-3-24.png)The Daily RemindersGiles P Croft![](https://storage.ghost.io/c/9b/f3/9bf3d316-7d32-494b-814f-a7d94d6358c3/content/images/thumbnail/2025-10-31-Pattern-matching.JPG)](https://www.gilespcroft.com/pattern-matching-relationships/)