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# My job vs. Your job
- URL: https://www.gilespcroft.com/my-job-vs-your-job/
- Published: 2024-06-26T07:00:00.000Z
- Updated: 2026-09-12T10:32:37.000Z
- Description: It's a common belief that to ‘overcome’ trauma, we have to re-live it. But what if that's just not the case? 🤨
- Author: Giles P Croft
- Tags: Trauma, Richard Carlson, Sharing, Acceptance, Consciousness, Grief, Life change, Mental Health, Principles, Psychology, Resilience, Thought realisation, FOUNDATIONS, #1:1 CTA

There's a bit in Richard Carlson's stupendously good book, [You Can Be Happy No Matter What](https://amzn.to/48LWjb0?ref=gilespcroft.com), where he talks about traumatic events, and really nails it.

The first thing he makes clear is that, in the very, *very* simplest of terms:

🫥

****Healing = Forgetting**

Because if we imagine a life where that past event no longer has any hold over us, and we’re living a happy, peaceful life, then, while we may be able to *recall* the event, we’ve forgotten the ‘hurt’.

Richard says, 

> *“If we can learn to stop frightening ourselves with our own thoughts, we are on our way to a happier life, irrespective of what we had to go through.”*

When we remind ourselves that 100% of our actual *experience* of life is brought to us via the [Principle of Thought](https://www.gilespcroft.com/inside-out/), it makes total sense that to heal, is to forget, because ultimately, if it's not *there*, there's no pain.

🤷‍♀️

## But how can it be ‘not there’?

This is how an innate health practitioner (like me, Hi 👋🏻) will help you through past traumatic experiences.

In a [different book](https://amzn.to/4p771xF?ref=gilespcroft.com), there’s a beautiful little description of a session, where the client, having been pointed in this direction—towards forgetting a deeply traumatic event—gets quite upset and protests, 

> *“But I don’t know if I can!”* 😫

The reply that comes is simply for the ages:

> *“That's my job. I'm going to help you learn how to forget. Your job is to want to forget.”*

😙👌🏻

---

We’ve been so comprehensively indoctrinated into a model that says to ‘overcome’ trauma, we have to re-live it… when in reality that just keeps it alive.

This mass-hypnosis around trauma makes it look like ‘forgetting’ is either impossible, or just plain denial.

To be clear: in an Innate Health healing session, it’s not that past experiences don’t come up, or are deliberately avoided. It’s just that when we have a solid grounding in what thought is/how it works, these previously painful memories take on a completely different characteristic, and they get resolved, naturally.

They lose their power.

The forgetting begins.

And the phrase ‘post-traumatic growth’ starts to make more sense.

💟 

Giles

p.s. Most of us have been through some terrible sh\*t in our lives. Some more than others. If you’re still suffering as a result of that, and you'd like to change, then why not let me help you learn **how* to forget, so that you can get back to happy, healthy & re-connected to life.

It’s what I do! And the only requirement from you, is that you genuinely **want* to forget.

Head over to [gilespcroft.com/individuals](https://www.gilespcroft.com/individuals) and get in touch with me to arrange a block of sessions, when the time is right.